The Stupid – it Burnses us!!

It’s been a great day.

We set out to weed the garden, clean up the pool and put down the first dose of ‘death in a can’ to deal with the roaches and spiders. y’know, for those people that don’t like the things, that might be coming to visit us soon… 😉

well, we got finished faster than we expected – so what else could we do?

ian asleep

yep, one of the hazards of joondalup is the roving papparazzi, who will catch you unawares and post you on the interwebs..

After a strenuous (ahem) morning, we grabbed some lunch and headed off to the skip in our ute – the recycling here puts anything in the UK to shame.

Here’ s a novel idea – rather than throwing stuff in the skip, they look at it and decide if someone else could use it… so if you want plant pots, or old wooden chairs, or any other sort of tat, you can go along to the municipal tip and help yourself – it goes to landfill eventually if nobody wants it.. cool huh?

Anyway, we then headed to IKEA for some boxes and odds and ends, and settled down to another strenuous afternoon in the pool. This time it actually was strenuous, due to my swimming practice.

subbie

Meet ‘Subbie’. He’s a sub bug, and we have two of them – a blue and a purple. Basically, you pop a battery in them, and they have a little prop on the back – they go like stink, and are pretty erratic.

Subbie here is helping me to learn to swim – basically I drop them in the water, then chase them. simple, but very effective – today I was diving to the bottom and clearing out my snorkel like a pro.

Dinner was steak from the Barbie, and a nice ice cold drink.

That’s where things went horribly, horribly wrong.

We forgot one little thing, you see.

Sunscreen.

Half a tub of nivea after sun later, and it still hurts like being dragged along behind a truck, across some salty gravel. probably.

Jen’s in a worse state than me – I guess the only consolation here is that it’s the first serious sunburn incident since we got here.

pack a hat, folks!!

New theme for the blog, and a new car!

Well, actually, you can’t get much further from a new car!!

Our 'Ute' 

Nissan Navara Utility 'Ute' Truck

This has enough space to carry stuff when we move house, and means that we can actually go somewhere with folks when they are over without having to either take the train, or squeeze into the unfeasibly small back seat of the 207cc.

Cars don’t really die in Australia, at least not from old age the way they do in the UK. No salt on the roads, less moisture and no nasty cold starts mean that trucks like this one (1989) just keep running and running.

Ours has done over 290000 km and all still works (even the air con works).

plenty of space in the back too:

The Back of the Ute.

Spot the pole for holding up the rear hatch!!

And then, the piper must be paid.

Back to work, and that means back to the weight loss and diet. Time to survey the damage from all that beer, the monster paella servings and various cakes and biscuits.

ouch.

My weight is back up to 106.1Kg – nearly 6lbs heavier than before christmas. I’m hoping to be able to go up to Exmouth at Easter and be able to enjoy the beach without well meaning folks trying to roll me back in the sea..

so, I did the only thing i could – I Wiiiiiiiiiiii’ed 🙂

Twenty Minutes. Oh yeah. 

I raised the Wii fit balance board up on a couple of phone books (about 12cm off the ground) and did twenty minutes of free step with the pace set to max. This will do the trick!!

I’m gonna need a bigger boat…

Mel and Rudy were great hosts over chrimble and new year, but serously, these guys are crazy. It must be something about the heat, or the water, or goodness knows what… but yikes.

let me explain.

After the shark attack in Port Kennedy, they were non plussed, and to be honest, I can see the point – back home if you heard about a climber falling to their doom in the grampians, you would just shrug your shoulders and accept that this is what happens sometimes. I guess the aussies view being eaten by a large carniverous fish in the same light.

So, yesterday, we spent an incredible day at Penguin Island. Sounds nice and safe, penguin island… complete with fluffy penguins. At the end of the day, and after much cajoling/emcouragement, Jen and I kayaked back across from the island to the mainland.

major achievement – as most of you will remember, I can barely swim. heck before I came out here, I couldn’t swim at all. but hey, there’s us –

basking in the glory having kayaked across. (for what it’s worth, we beat the ferry 😀 ).

As it is, we did much better than the poor asian girl who tried to *walk* across the sandbar – and swallowed a stack of sea water when it got rough. The ambulance was just arriving for them at the jetty when we landed in the kayaks.

So today, when Jen spots the story we have a read, and flick through the comments, to find the guy who says ‘what, no comment about this being just round the corner from the shark attacks?’

one quick visit to Google maps, and it all becomes clear – these Aussies are downright certifiable. not only do they choose to go boating a couple of days after a shark attack, they go to to the same damn bay.

So, once more, a Happy 2009. I’m kinda glad to be in one piece to say it!!!

less than three feet of water…

See that picture I posted yesterday, of me standing in less than three feet of water, about 5-6 metres from the shore? That’s quite a thing for me, being a bit of a woos when it comes to sharks – that’s the second time in Australia that I have actually set foot in the ocean.

This fear of nature is something that causes great hilarity for the aussies – and I have taken an almighty ribbing about it. I purposely don’t say that I have a phobia about sharks (that’s selacophobia, btw) because, as far as I am concerned, there’s nothing irrational in the slightest about having a fear of what is essentially a self propelled mouth filled with razor sharp teeth. I think that’s a quite healthy fear to have actually.

on this morning’s news, this took on a more serious note, when some poor bugger was ‘taken’ by what is believed to be a 4 metre long pointer shark off the beach at port kennedy. that’s here:


View Larger Map

We were staying down at Preston Beach, 40km down the coast (and will be again for hogmanay), Perth is about 80km to the north. The beach is closed, and they are out hunting for his body.

The guy was snorkelling for crabs with his 24 year old son when there was a ‘violent disturbance in the water’ and lots of blood.

I think that, on the whole, I am going to maintain my healthy fear of the coastline, and not adopt the more relaxed attitude that the aussies have. Statistically, you may well be more likely to be hit by lightning than eaten by a shark, but I’m not about to start playing golf in thunderstorms either…

Merry Australian Summer Festival!

Coz it can’t be christmas, can it?

For days now, we have been doing double takes when driving past houses – christmas trees look sooooo weird in the middle of summer!!

My boss Rudy and his wife very kindly invited us down to their beach house in Preston Beach (we have been down a few times) and we have had a relaxed fun couple of days so far. It’s been pretty awesome.

First night down, we had a giant tapas style feast – we brought a frittata, some devilled sausage and some patatas bravas – but the star of the show was Mel’s paella. To say this was a big paella pan was a bit of an understatement…

After spending christmas morning at the beach house with Rudy’s parents, we headed off to Mel’s folks – an absolutley gorgeous place by the murray river (well, ‘a’ murray river, rather than ‘the’ murray river – that’s over east where they are having the big drought). incredible. They have their own jetty and a couple of boats.

Mel’s folks (also called Ian and Jenny!!) made us very welcome for dinner, and Ian took us all upstream on the river

The guys had upgraded their net connection to make sure we had the bandwidth to do skype video, so we spoke to Jens family (asides from Robert who refused to get out of bed). Diana did a nice little rendition of We Wish You a Merry Christmas on the xylophone, and Adam ran around like a maddy.

We have recorded a wee christmas video message, but youtube is being a bit odd, so it may be a day or so before that appears.

Today, we went down to the beach, where the aussies insisted that it was too windy (!) seriously, the best beach we have seen outside of the carribean, and it’s too cold… check this out:

happy birthday to me… :D

My Birthday was nearly two weeks ago, so I didn’t really expect to be finding anything in the post waiting for me.. but tonight, there was a fairly bulky parcel in the postbox.

I expected it to be for the landlord (he gets a lot of mail, which stacks up until we get bored and drop it off at the letting agent’s office), but no, it was addressed to me (and I have to admit to being a little excited)

Rush into the house like a kid, and attack the package with scissors to find out it’s a parcel in birthday wrapping paper – all the way from Falkirk 😀

Alan and Penny, you guys rock – thanks for the card, and also for the T-shirt:

For anyone who hasn’t come across the atheist bus campaign, it’s a humorous antidote to those tedious alpha and ‘real meaning of christmas’ adverts that pop up all over the place at this time of the year – and an indication of just how many people really would just rather get on with their lives in peace, thanks all the same!!

I think in all honesty, that I won’t be wearing this one at the office, but I will be wearing it at the next Perth Atheist/Humanist meetup – I’m sure it will go down a storm!!

Top of the World, ma!

I am quite careful not to say too much about my work on the blog (even though I know that a few of the readers are co-workers). It’s just professional not to say anything in such a public forum that might cause people to look at the company as if I spoke for them (on anything more than techy things) or, conversely, that I was somehow responsible for them.

But then, sometimes things are so cool you have to say *something* So, without giving too much away…

I have been in Melbourne, working on a huge government tender – how huge? well, the solution has over 340 Tb of storage space, over a hundred servers, and costs more than any of us are likely to see in a lifetime (barring a big lottery win). absolutley exilirating, to even be involved in this is cool, but to be playing a key role… it’s incredible… and off the back of that one, I’m now involved as the solution owner on another big tender. I am one happy, happy bunny right now.

So much so, that I didn’t even mind that much spending my birthday in Melbourne whilst jen was stuck back in Perth. We tried not to think about it.. but here’s the thing. Australia is so big that Jen and I were further apart than we have ever been before in our entire lives, even before we met.

I took this from the top of the Rialto tower:

dont jump. no, seriously.

The rialto is one of the ‘great towers of the world’ – and was the tallest in the southern hemisphere until recently. Being in Melbourne was pretty cool – it reminded me of being in a vibrant city again. I have considered myself glaswegian ever since I went to University (hell, you gotta do something to lose the stigma of lanarkshire, right Scott? 😉 ) but even more so now. Glasgow is one of the great cities of the world, and I don’t think I’ll ever look at it in the same jaded way again…

What this did do though was through Perth into sharp contrast – so I have a new video too:

that’s all for now, I need to sleep – I have work in the morning, and I can’t wait.

The adventure continues.

Yup, time to pick ourselves out of the doldrums and get on with it. Australia is a pretty big dissappointment but that’s not going to change – we have resolevd to make the best of it for the time we are here.

We are seeing a bunch of adverts about Australia the movie with the first actress I ever had a serious crush on, Nicole Kidman. quite surreal to see what is portrayed (sunny, blue skies, wide “red dirt” country) comapred to what it’s actually like – very cold (there was snow in New South Wales this week – and remember, this is supposed to be summer!!), unbelievably wet (according to the government website, Perth actually gets more rain in a year than Edinburgh) and quite lush and green (from all the rain!).

It’s odd that weather plays so big a part in this for us, but really, that’s the one thing we were looking for. we reckoned being far away from home would be sufferable, and missing everyone would be tough… but hey – at least the weather will be better, right? anyways. positive. upbeat.

We have a plan!

We basically have about twenty to thirty hours a week with absolutely nothing to do (basically, every week day night, and at least one day of the weekend). Perth is essentially a waiting room for a mortuary, so there’s plenty of free time (seriously. there’s more night life under a plant pot.)

Plan A hasn’t worked out too well. That involved easing the boredom with alcohol (we have got through a frankly terrifying amount of the stuff since we got here – I am sure everyone remembers that I am an incredible lightweight: 2 pints and I am anybody’s. In one month, I put away 2 CRATES of strongbow.)
So, Plan B involves using the free time to get in lots of exercise, get the diet back under check and cut back on the sauce. It’s going rather well – Jen’s Wii Mii is looking decidedly more active now, and she has lost a good 12 pounds: I’m down a good 6 pounds (I started later).

actually, we have two plans – the other plan is for coming home. It won’t be until 2010 at the earliest, so don’t get the party hats bought in just yet, but we have started the plans – sorting out stuff to ship back to the UK now (so we don’t have to lug it around when we move house here!) and the stuff that needs to stay with us.

We have mentioned the plan(tm) to a couple of you, but here goes: we are coming back to scotland.  As I say, this won’t be happening right away, but we will be coming back when our Visa runs out (if not before). The reason this has now become something we are looking forward to is…

RTW tickets.

A few of the big airline groups (like the Star Alliance with BMI etc) offer round the world tickets – you have a maximum distance, and number of stops, and they work out at only a grand or so more than the cost of actually flying directly home!!

The plan includes Singapore, Tokyo, Beijing, Los Angeles, Florida, Washington and New York so far, with a few days in each. Should be fun. let’s face it – after Perth, anything will be fun!!!

if you don’t have anything good to say…

Don’t say anything. That’s how it goes right? it explains our lack of posts for a while unfortunately.

This is apparently all normal, and what happens when people emigrate – a sort of culture shock.it’s biting pretty hard at the moment, which is probably down to living through the longest winter of our lives.

in the big scheme of things, we have very little to complain about, and we need to keep reminding ourselves of that.. but sheesh. every time I wake up and the weather is cold, wet and miserable (and it got down to 3 degrees above – with no double glazing, no central heating and no insulation, remember) I just slump.

So, here’s the latest video – not my cheeriest..

After that, we needed to cheer up… so we went to the range… and the the day improved 😀

Seriously – Get Skype !!

One of the things that makes being on the other side of the world less of a big deal is the easy access to webcams and stuff.

We are using my laptop webcam for now, and it’s magic – I have been chatting to my Mum most weeks for a bit on the webcam, and it really does make it seem much less of a deal to be so far away.

I also took part in a podcast interview about home automation with a guy in England, and another in Northern Ireland on Sunday there – again using Skype.

I have been a bit of a misery about Skype in the past (it’s using a closed protocol, and not ‘open’ in the slightest), but to be honest… what more do you want for free?

So c’mon folks – get Skype installed. It’s a free download, all you need is a set of earphones and a microphone (cheap headsets from PC World are about a tenner). A Webcam is better, but not needed… and give us a shout online.

What a Weekend!

Well, the weather seems to have broken a bit – nice sunny weekend, and after our usual shopping trip we headed off to the GO 3 Expo. A Gamers show, where it seems that pretty much everyone in Perth plays Call of Duty 4, and Perth (unlike E3) still employs ‘booth babes’. oh yeah.

Today, we headed off to the Avon Descent – basically a bunch of crazy people throwing themselves down the rapids in rafts, speedboats and canoes. it’s an annual thing, but this year the river is really high, and has burst it’s banks in places. We realised that this was serious when we started to see canoes floating past on their own. yikes.

Still, good fun and on the way back, we managed to solve the Mystery of the Roadside Pumpkins! Yes, it’s time for another video:

The Cost of doing (the) business…

One of the things we had to think about coming out here was the cost of living – the received wisdom is that it’s cheaper to live, that the standard of living is higher. To be honest, the closer we got to flying out, the more concerned we were getting that this really wasn’t the case..

So, here we are two months after arriving – we are paying bills and just getting on with normal life rather than the really unusual ‘is this still a holiday’ feeling. How has it panned out? The exchange rate is currently 2.05 AUD to 1 GBP, so basically, take the prices I am mentioning here and divide them by two, you are pretty much on the money.

Well, there’s the obvious ones – Petrol is cheap cheap. We pay between 1.40 and 1.50 for a litre of fuel, which is insanely low – although, you wouldn’t think so to hear the local press. They are moaning about this as if it was the end of the world. Public transport is not too bad. I spend 3.83 each way on the train each morning: which gets me about the same distance as going from Wishaw to Glasgow Central.

Electricity is about $126 a month – and as you know, we are not light users, what with the computers. We don’t have a gas bill yet, so we have yet to see what the Hot Tub costs to run!

Eating out is expensive – and very, very poor. We have had two hugely dissappointing chinese meals, both with gristley meat, dry chillis added, and bizzare selection of odd veg – cauliflower and broccoli? in a kung po chicken? blech. The indian food is even worse – Angad and Naveen, the two indian guys in the office reckon that it’s just not possible to get a decent indian meal in Western Australia… still, getting back to the point, a pretty poor indian meal (not even as good as you would get from the 3-in-1 on a friday night) set me back about $55, a similarly poor chinese meal was $46.

The exception is steakhouses – they are pretty darn good and seem to be very cheap: The ‘Hog’s Breath’ in Joondalup cost about $40 for plates that were quite a challenge to finish – and tasty too.

Pizza Hut is interesting for the differences – the pizzas are much smaller for one! the ‘large’ Australian pizza is about the same as the medium UK one: they don’t do one as large (except as special promos). They are cheap though – we got Three large pizzas for $13 and ate them over two nights!

There’s a fish and chip shop in the local shopping area, and they do portions that could , in all seriousness, cause a heart attack in one sitting. two ‘scoops’ of chips for $4, which is about 30cm by 30cm when wrapped up… a fish supper (that’s a ‘barramundi’ or ‘red snapper’ supper, of course, not cod or haddock!) is about $12.

We did a big shop today (one of our famous batch cooking sessions to fill up the freezer), and that’s a good chance to show what the prices are like for just normal ‘stuff’. We get our veg from a farmer’s market rather than Woolworths or Coles (asda/tesco in everything but name)…

That lot cost $31 – including $2 for the 2L apple juice and about $4 for the eggs (which are free range – they don’t seem to do any other kind). One thing that’s a little eerie, and I need to point out – the fruit/veg really is that colour – there’s no paint/photoshop trickery here.. The stuff just seems more bright, crunchy.. almost more ‘real’. That’s one thing – we are eating dramatically more wholesome food here in australia – the fruit and veg is delicious, and just seems to taste better.

I guess I should doff my cap to Iain Lawson at this point and admit defeat – it seems that my defence of Tesco etc was misguided!! C’moan the fairmers!

in fact, when we popped to the farmers market today, a wholesale butchers has opened in the next unit so we are using that too. it’s a little like costco’s butchers department in it’s scale, but that’s all it does.

Em and Anna are probably the ones who will get this (being Costco meat junkies like us!) but this lot came to about $160 – which includes $31 for a side (yes, a whole side) of lamb, and those giant packs of chicken ($9 a kilo) The mince is premium lean stuff, and costs about $4 a kilo.

Soft drinks are about $3.50 for a 2L bottle of diet coke – the harder stuff varies a lot: beer is cheap, whisky is, how shall we say it.. not. I found a shop selling Bruichladdich ($79 a bottle) and Bowmore 12 year old ($75 a bottle).

so… basically, yes – the staples of life are a bit cheaper. Our problem came from the fact that we lived out in the boonies, lived very cheaply from low cost supermarkets etc, and wore clothe supplied by George and Matalan… so we started from a fairly low base. I suspect that anyone who lived a slightly more upmarket life in the UK would be finding Perth quite a bit cheaper.

Righty, time to get the next bacth of mega-bolognese on the go…

Wine makes Jenni clever…

So we better get more wine then!

Had a really nice weekend (and here we are almost at the next one and only just writing about it now.. tsk!) last week – we were invited out for dinner on Friday night, which turned into an all nighter, and we slept over.. before rushing back to get the old squad together for a mammoth session on ‘City of Heroes’.

lots of fun – we started about 9pm, 2 in the afternoon for the UK guys, then continued on until the wee small hours: 4.30am! of course, when we woke up in the morning (just), the UK guys were only just finishing off themselves – also at 4am. damn, but that’s one addictive game!

so, where does the Wine come in? well – on the sunday, we had a very pleasant meander through the Swan Valley wine region (Perth is build around the Swan River) and visited a small vineyard – the absolutely beautiful Henley Park Winery. It’s run by a couple who emigrated here from Denmark, and they have a wine tasting during the day.

A beautiful part of the country, and not that far from civilisation (well, not any further from civilsation than anything is when you are in the world’s most remote city!) – and the vineyards themselves are positively iddylic.

I think we have a new goal in life… 🙂

CMA Verlaine, and APL Zircon..

Two names that we have become very familar with over the last few weeks. We have been using a couple of cool websites (well, cool for this one purpose – dull as dishwater for anyone else, I am sure!): http://www.sailwx.info and http://www.vesseltracker.com

Our stuff was all loaded by Crown into a container, which was then punted by truck down to Southampton. From there, it was loaded onto the first – the CMA CGM Verlaine, an open deck container ship which sailed to Bruge, to finish getting loaded, then cugged it’s way along the english channel, down through the Bay of Biscay, across the Med to the Mouth of Suez.. along the canal, then out into the Red Sea. It docked at Jedda, then headed out into the Indian Ocean, and east towards the Port of Kelang (Kuala Lumpur).

At this point, our container was unloaded onto the dock, and verlaine continued on to China to pick up it’s next load of stuff en route to Europe. In the mean time, the second ship – the APL Zircon. I don’t have a picture of her, so here’s a picture of her sister ship – the appropriately named APL Scotland.

Zircon left Kelang on the 9th July and began her journey south towards the Port of Fremantle (or ‘Freo’ to the locals), where she is due to arrive on the 15th July…

along with all of our stuff! now we just need to wait on Aussie customs poring over everything and deciding what they do and don’t like the look of, and we should get the Wii back, and the Telly.. and our bikes… and the couch…

sigh. I kinda miss our stuff. very Tyler Durden in the whole ‘the things you own, end up owning you’ I know, but dammit, I just want to have a comfy couch to sit on and watch a movie on something other than my PC monitor.

In the meantime, Jen and I have been like a couple of explorers, giving new names to stuff.

First was when we made a spaghetti bolognese from some minced kangaroo.. we could’t quite decide – should it be a boloroo? or a kanganese? in the end, we settled on… Roo-gu! pure genius.

Not as cool as today’s though – we spotted another Skippy-related roadside incident, and Jen came up with a new name for them.. Roo-dkill. heh.

I’ll get me coat…

A perfect day..

So yesterday was a bit wet and miserable. The weather is a bit of a focus for us at the moment, as it is unbelievably cold at nights. My boss Rudy reckoned that this would be one of the coldest winters we had ever experienced… and coming from Scotland I had a good old laugh.

oh boy was he right.

The problem is that Australian houses are built to get rid of heat in the summer. They have white painted walls, tiled surfaces, overhanging roofs to shade the windows.. and not a stick of insulation.

Houses built in the last few years are starting to get (some) insulation – nobody has double glazing, as it’s only needed for sound proofing.. and folks get around it in the winter months by blasting on the gas fires, electric heaters and wood stoves.

I guess the whole idea of building a passive insulated house with decent thermal management to keep the heat in during winter and keep the cold air in during summer will start to kick in as fuel prices continue to rise.. but for this year, in our rented house…

brrr.

We have a couple of DeLonghi dragon electric heaters to keep the bedroom warm, but it’s like being back at our crappy flat in Motherwell. All of the folks we speak to have a little chortle, and say something along the lines of ‘wait till summer…’

That being said – today has been delicious. we nipped out to the local IGA (independent growers of australia – like Spar) to grab some bacon and rolls.. had a delicious breakfast sitting out on the deck… pottered around the house doing some weeding, put the pool cover back on (we had to leave it off for a couple of days, as the chlorine was a bit high), and settled down a lazy afternoon in the hot tub.

Nothing quite like a soak in the hot tub, couple of bottles of cider and just putting the world’s wrongs to right.. the suns just at that lovely ‘last light of the day’ stage just now – everything’s golden orange and yellow.. in fact, here’s a quick photo of the view from my desk – this is looking towards the edge of Joondalup.

So, settling down to read a book and generally chill before dinner. It’s days like this that just make you hapy to be alive 🙂

Skippy!

Couple of folks have asked about Kangaroos – and after  amonth or so in Australia, we had seen Kangaroos twice. Once on the way up to Lancelin…

And once in the IGA (that’s Independent Growers of Australia, the equivelant of Spar). That one didn’t look too clever either…

So, I asked in the office, got some pointers to ‘Roo country (apparently, driving down any road at night is a surefire way to meet “one of those tough little bast**ds”, and by “meet” we mean “smack into with the car, spin off wildly and barely survive”)… and are proud to present – Kangaroos!

Yep, yer bona-fide in the wild Kangaroos – just like Deer, actually, and behave the same when startled etc.